Monday, July 27, 2009

And I saw a bit of myself in a hazy imagination

Fault-filled failures follow me everywhere. Yet still I live in this acceptance. This love that is unconfined. This love that heals the blind hearts of men and makes them more than they are. It is gradually becoming more difficult to turn my thoughts from this ideal. But it is not a bad thing. Beneficial and balanced I say. Upside-down and uncontrolled they say. Yet their words do not phase me. I am undaunted by this simple task. It is so easy. And still I may be wrong. I may live incorrect but this is the manner in which my heart drives me. The end result which will build up and not tear down. Where are your accusers He said. They are not here, and neither do I condemn you. So what has this become this view of judgmental arrogance. This pointing of pointer fingers and heavy sighs accompanied my gentle downward-facing shakes of the head. Who am I to say anything? Just as they dropped their stones one by one and left, so I leave. Knowing that I can only seek inside myself to be aware of my own faults. Why seek the mistakes of others? To feel better about myself? There is no need. I feel better about myself resting in the knowledge of who I am, who I am becoming, and whom I belong to. My mind is still struggling a bit, but I would dare say that He is all I need. That He is who I wish to become. Not a judgmental thing, but Love, a Love so wholly embodied, personified and life-giving. This is what I want to be. This is who I will continue to become.

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